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spudfan



Member Since: 10 Sep 2007
Location: Co Donegal
Posts: 4473

Ireland 
Rolling with laughter Rolling with laughter 1982 88" 2.25 diesel
1992 110 200tdi csw -Zikali
2008 110 2.4 tdci csw-Zulu
2011 110 2.4 tdci csw-Masai
Post #967843 16th Oct 2022 1:07pm
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90 Dreamer



Member Since: 13 Jul 2019
Location: Oop North
Posts: 2050

United Kingdom 2016 Defender 90 Puma 2.2 HT Corris Grey
Cragster69 wrote:

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Never a truer word spoke in jest........ Cool
Post #967846 16th Oct 2022 1:16pm
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spudfan



Member Since: 10 Sep 2007
Location: Co Donegal
Posts: 4473

Ireland 
Margaret Thatcher "The Lady is not for turning".
Liz Truss "My head is dizzy from this merry-go-round..." 1982 88" 2.25 diesel
1992 110 200tdi csw -Zikali
2008 110 2.4 tdci csw-Zulu
2011 110 2.4 tdci csw-Masai
Post #967850 16th Oct 2022 1:41pm
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Cragster69



Member Since: 15 Jun 2021
Location: Scotland
Posts: 166

Scotland 2007 Defender 110 Puma 2.4 CSW Cairns Blue

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 Craig.

“Don't believe everything you read on the internet.” ― Abraham Lincoln

www.scotgrc.co.uk
Post #967947 16th Oct 2022 9:23pm
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Arkaig



Member Since: 01 Feb 2020
Location: Highland
Posts: 41

Scotland 

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[/img]
Post #968100 17th Oct 2022 9:40pm
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RFT



Member Since: 13 Nov 2010
Location: Cheshire
Posts: 674

United Kingdom 2010 Defender 130 Puma 2.4 HCPU Zermatt Silver
 130 Puma HCPU with an Artica 240LR Demountable Camper
Post #968108 17th Oct 2022 10:54pm
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Cragster69



Member Since: 15 Jun 2021
Location: Scotland
Posts: 166

Scotland 2007 Defender 110 Puma 2.4 CSW Cairns Blue
 Craig.

“Don't believe everything you read on the internet.” ― Abraham Lincoln

www.scotgrc.co.uk
Post #968455 20th Oct 2022 4:46pm
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Cragster69



Member Since: 15 Jun 2021
Location: Scotland
Posts: 166

Scotland 2007 Defender 110 Puma 2.4 CSW Cairns Blue

 Craig.

“Don't believe everything you read on the internet.” ― Abraham Lincoln

www.scotgrc.co.uk
Post #968456 20th Oct 2022 4:46pm
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Muddybigdog



Member Since: 11 Apr 2014
Location: Suffolk
Posts: 991

United Kingdom 2007 Defender 90 Puma 2.4 XS CSW Zambezi Silver
A man sees a sign outside a house - 'Talking Dog For Sale.' He rings the bell, the owner appears and tells him the dog can be viewed in the back garden.

The man sees a very nice looking Labrador Retriever sitting there.

"Do you really talk?" he asks the dog.
"Yes," the Labrador replies.

After recovering from the shock of hearing the dog talk, the man asks, "So, tell me your story."

The Labrador looks up and says, "Well, I discovered that I could talk when I was pretty young. I wanted to help the government, so I was sold to the SAS. In no time at all they had me jetting from country to country, sitting in rooms with spies and world leaders, because no one imagined that a dog would be eavesdropping. I was one of their most valuable spies for eight years".

"But the jetting around really tired me out, and I knew I wasn't getting any younger so I decided to settle down. I signed up for a job at Heathrow Airport to do some undercover security work, wandering near suspicious characters and listening in. I uncovered some incredible dealings and was awarded several medals".

"Then I got married, had a few puppies, and now I've just retired."
The man is amazed. He goes back into the house and asks the owner how much he wants for the dog.
"Ten quid," the owner says.
"£10!!? But your dog is absolutely amazing! Why on earth are you selling him so cheaply?"



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"Because he's a lying devil, he's never been out of the garden." Jumped ship to reliability - Mitsubishi L200
Puma 90 XS - Sold
D3 - 2.7 S x2 (both Sold)
Freelander 2 HSE - Sold
Freelander 1 - Sold
Disco 2 - Sold
Post #968858 25th Oct 2022 10:47am
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Landymatt



Member Since: 31 Dec 2018
Location: York
Posts: 191

United Kingdom 
Paddy visits his mate Mick who is laid up with a broken leg.
Mick asks him to go upstairs and get his slippers for him.
Whilst upstairs Paddy spies Mick's gorgeous 18 year old twin daughters. Paddy says to them, "Hi girls, your fathers sent me up here to shag you both."
The girls tell him they don't believe him, Paddy says he will prove it and shouts down to Mick, "Both of them Mick?"
Mick shouts back, "Of course, what's the point in just F**king one!"
Post #968895 25th Oct 2022 6:15pm
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spudfan



Member Since: 10 Sep 2007
Location: Co Donegal
Posts: 4473

Ireland 

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 1982 88" 2.25 diesel
1992 110 200tdi csw -Zikali
2008 110 2.4 tdci csw-Zulu
2011 110 2.4 tdci csw-Masai
Post #969031 27th Oct 2022 12:56am
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RFT



Member Since: 13 Nov 2010
Location: Cheshire
Posts: 674

United Kingdom 2010 Defender 130 Puma 2.4 HCPU Zermatt Silver

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 130 Puma HCPU with an Artica 240LR Demountable Camper
Post #969088 27th Oct 2022 7:20pm
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RoadForce



Member Since: 17 Jul 2014
Location: Holland
Posts: 323

Netherlands 2000 Defender 130 Td5 HCPU Coniston Green
...with the joke being that his license was not revoked? These types should not be on the road ever again! Defender 130 HCPU Td5 MY2000
Post #969259 29th Oct 2022 9:30am
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Procta



Member Since: 04 Dec 2016
Location: Sunderland
Posts: 4932

United Kingdom 
An old, blind Marine wanders into an all-girl biker bar by mistake.
He finds his way to a bar stool and orders a shot of Jack Daniels.
After sitting there for a while, he yells to the bartender, 'Hey, you wanna hear a blonde joke?'
The bar immediately falls absolutely silent.
In a very deep, husky voice, the woman next to him says,
'Before you tell that joke I think it is only fair, given that you are blind, that you should know five things:
1. The bartender is a blonde girl with a baseball bat.
2. The bouncer is a blonde girl.
3. I'm a 6-foot tall, 175-pound blonde woman with a black belt in karate.
4. The woman sitting next to me is blonde and a professional weight lifter.
5. The lady to your right is blonde and a professional wrestler.
Now, think about it seriously, do you still wanna tell that blonde joke?'
The blind Marine thinks for a second, shakes his head and mutters, 'No...not if I'm gonna have to explain it five times.' Defender TD5 90 ---/--- Peugeot 306 HDI hatch back

Success is 90% Inspiration and 4 minutes Preparation # you can make it!
Post #969293 29th Oct 2022 4:00pm
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Cragster69



Member Since: 15 Jun 2021
Location: Scotland
Posts: 166

Scotland 2007 Defender 110 Puma 2.4 CSW Cairns Blue

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 Craig.

“Don't believe everything you read on the internet.” ― Abraham Lincoln

www.scotgrc.co.uk
Post #969621 1st Nov 2022 11:14am
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