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andydef90



Member Since: 09 Feb 2015
Location: yorkshire
Posts: 617

United Kingdom 2014 Defender 90 Puma 2.2 HT Corris Grey
can i rant
Hi guys the last bank holiday Monday the wife and i went to south shields to see her son and his partner .
It took two hours to get there we was supposed to be going out for the day .
however when we arrive we was informe his partner was having lunch and was waiting for a email .
we hung around and nothing we took her son out for a meal it was very nice busy but i would be .
ON return still no sign of his partner and after a cuppa we said we needed to get back to the dog . he shouted upstairs to say we was going and got nothing had gone to sleep .
Is it me or was that just plane rude the last time we had seen them we gave them a good bit of money not that should matter but after over a hundred miles to get there and go back home I think it was rude . Exclamation
Post #995437 7th Jun 2023 2:03pm
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Mossberg



Member Since: 29 Feb 2020
Location: Lancs
Posts: 552

United Kingdom 1993 Defender 90 300 Tdi HT Aintree Green
Both rude and sad to be honest.
Post #995442 7th Jun 2023 2:36pm
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Leamreject



Member Since: 19 Dec 2020
Location: Middle Earth - Leamington Spa
Posts: 955

Italy 2011 Defender 90 Puma 2.4 HT Fuji White
Re: can i rant
andydef90 wrote:
Hi guys the last bank holiday Monday the wife and i went to south shields to see her son and his partner .
It took two hours to get there we was supposed to be going out for the day .
however when we arrive we was informe his partner was having lunch and was waiting for a email .
we hung around and nothing we took her son out for a meal it was very nice busy but i would be .
ON return still no sign of his partner and after a cuppa we said we needed to get back to the dog . he shouted upstairs to say we was going and got nothing had gone to sleep .
Is it me or was that just plane rude the last time we had seen them we gave them a good bit of money not that should matter but after over a hundred miles to get there and go back home I think it was rude . Exclamation



Spend your valuable time on something more deserving Whistle Ride like you stole it!!
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Post #995445 7th Jun 2023 2:54pm
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the_lincs_landies



Member Since: 29 May 2023
Location: Boston, Lincs
Posts: 230

United Kingdom 
Definitely rude.

And although it shouldn't have a bearing on things, if you'd leant/given a 'considerable' amount of money then you'd think they would extend the courtesy of some manners/company to show their gratitude.
Post #995453 7th Jun 2023 3:48pm
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TexasRover



Member Since: 24 Nov 2022
Location: Paris
Posts: 794

France 2002 Defender 110 Td5 DCPU Chawton White
Are you sure there still is a partner?
Post #995470 7th Jun 2023 5:36pm
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Procta



Member Since: 04 Dec 2016
Location: Sunderland
Posts: 4937

United Kingdom 
My parents have had this in the past, we went down to visit my uncle and auntie, on my dads side of things. We took our caravan down and stayed on their farm, it was my aunties 50th at the time. Anyway, they had their daughter staying over, at the same time, which is fair enough. But on a arrival we got a bit of a frosty reception, and it was like there is a space park up and hook up. The party was ok mind, that was it. We did go around a local city while we were down there, and mam decided this would be the final time we would visit, due to how frosty things were, after the party. Anyway during that time up till 2018. They would do the odd surprise visits, and we would greet them with all the love etc as we would normally do. They sort of made of me, but nothing much of my sister, never really fussed her at all, even though she was my step dads bio daughter. Anyway we heard northing at all from them in 2019, me and my dad were in the area, picking up my defender. But my dad wasn't keen on making a visit, he just wanted to get back home. So it was a pick up and go. Then one night in February 2021, about 10 pm, my dad gets a call, from my auntie that my uncle had passed away. She gave some details etc, but that was about as far it went. My dads sister, who my dad doesn't get a long with, had been down there a few times. But not one of them, had the bottle. to ring my dad, and tell him, that my uncle was unwell at the time. We would have made it our business, to visit him back in 2019. After my uncle was buried, my auntie bells us, to ask if we were ok, after the very strong winds we had. It had turned out, that there had been one mega barney, at my uncles funeral, with my my auntie and my dads sister and her daughters. Over funeral and family arrangements etc, to the point they had cut all ties. My dad to this very day doesn't even know where my uncle is buried, all he got was a card, with a photo of my uncle from the wake, posted threw the door. I have found since i have grown up, that families, can cause more trouble or be more trouble than they are worth knowing. You cannot trust them at all, but all want to be around you, if they want something. Yet i have seen some families, that are so close. They will go to the moon and beyond with each other. Its true what they say, you can pick your pals, but not your family. Defender TD5 90 ---/--- Peugeot 306 HDI hatch back

Success is 90% Inspiration and 4 minutes Preparation # you can make it!
Post #995496 7th Jun 2023 8:51pm
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Procta



Member Since: 04 Dec 2016
Location: Sunderland
Posts: 4937

United Kingdom 
the_lincs_landies wrote:
Definitely rude.

And although it shouldn't have a bearing on things, if you'd leant/given a 'considerable' amount of money then you'd think they would extend the courtesy of some manners/company to show their gratitude.


That's the thanks you get sadly. Defender TD5 90 ---/--- Peugeot 306 HDI hatch back

Success is 90% Inspiration and 4 minutes Preparation # you can make it!
Post #995497 7th Jun 2023 8:52pm
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spudfan



Member Since: 10 Sep 2007
Location: Co Donegal
Posts: 4480

Ireland 
You have a daughter with special needs and your mother will not have anything to do with the child, did not even go to the christening. Daughter is 27, mother only seen her three times, my efforts. Yeah life can throw up some odd balls. But guess what, I see my lovely daughter every day but I cannot remember what my mother looks like. The choice had to made and my daughter won. No regrets. 1982 88" 2.25 diesel
1992 110 200tdi csw -Zikali
2008 110 2.4 tdci csw-Zulu
2011 110 2.4 tdci csw-Masai
Post #995558 8th Jun 2023 11:25am
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diesel_jim



Member Since: 13 Oct 2008
Location: hiding
Posts: 6037

United Kingdom 2006 Defender 110 Td5 SW Epsom Green
Procta wrote:
that families, can cause more trouble or be more trouble than they are worth knowing. You cannot trust them at all, but all want to be around you, if they want something. Yet i have seen some families, that are so close. They will go to the moon and beyond with each other. Its true what they say, you can pick your pals, but not your family.


+1 to that mate!!
Post #995581 8th Jun 2023 3:03pm
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Rashers



Member Since: 21 Jun 2015
Location: Norfolk
Posts: 3341

United Kingdom 2014 Defender 110 Puma 2.2 USW Corris Grey
spudfan wrote:
You have a daughter with special needs and your mother will not have anything to do with the child, did not even go to the christening. Daughter is 27, mother only seen her three times, my efforts. Yeah life can throw up some odd balls. But guess what, I see my lovely daughter every day but I cannot remember what my mother looks like. The choice had to made and my daughter won. No regrets.


How narrow minded is that? I can understand a family argument splitting a family up, but that is just beyond belief? How sad for you and your daughters, spud fan Crying or Very sad
Post #995664 8th Jun 2023 9:19pm
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Screbble



Member Since: 26 Apr 2015
Location: Lancashire
Posts: 2030

United Kingdom 2004 Defender 90 Td5 XS CSW Zambezi Silver
All sounds familiar, and whilst that doesn’t make it right, it shows that you’re not in your own.

What’s that saying, you can choose your friends but…

Families are strange things that get even stranger when they are extended by marriage etc.

Stick to paying attention to those that matter, and Defenders of course.
Post #995698 9th Jun 2023 8:34am
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the_lincs_landies



Member Since: 29 May 2023
Location: Boston, Lincs
Posts: 230

United Kingdom 
As they saying goes "you can't chose your family".

As another example of a-hole behaviour:- My Grandad and my Aunt fell out as my cousins were getting in to drugs, he didn't condone this and so told her that if they didn't buck up their ideas he would take them out of his will (as he wasn't having his inheritance blown on drugs!). She then kicked off that if he did that she would have nothing to with him - being stubborn, he stood his ground (and if you knew my aunt, you would back him, she's no real loss).

Fast forward a few years to May this year - my grandads health has been deteriorating, on 1st May he sadly passes away. My cousin (the 1 out of 3 of my Aunts sons that doesn't do drugs, the one "good egg") tells his mum the news... her response was "Its about bloody time he went. I suppose I best get to the Solicitors" - clearly intending to contest the contents of his will. No remorse, no sadness at the loss of her father, just pound signs in her eyes.
Post #995702 9th Jun 2023 9:06am
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windy81



Member Since: 14 Mar 2018
Location: North Wales
Posts: 311

Wales 1992 Defender 90 200 Tdi HT Firenze Red
She could be suffering an illness or something and doesn't want to see anyone. Who knows ?
Post #995726 9th Jun 2023 11:50am
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Procta



Member Since: 04 Dec 2016
Location: Sunderland
Posts: 4937

United Kingdom 
the_lincs_landies wrote:
As they saying goes "you can't chose your family".

As another example of a-hole behaviour:- My Grandad and my Aunt fell out as my cousins were getting in to drugs, he didn't condone this and so told her that if they didn't buck up their ideas he would take them out of his will (as he wasn't having his inheritance blown on drugs!). She then kicked off that if he did that she would have nothing to with him - being stubborn, he stood his ground (and if you knew my aunt, you would back him, she's no real loss).

Fast forward a few years to May this year - my grandads health has been deteriorating, on 1st May he sadly passes away. My cousin (the 1 out of 3 of my Aunts sons that doesn't do drugs, the one "good egg") tells his mum the news... her response was "Its about bloody time he went. I suppose I best get to the Solicitors" - clearly intending to contest the contents of his will. No remorse, no sadness at the loss of her father, just pound signs in her eyes.


You do get the crocodile tears, i have seen that twice and i warned my mate about it too. When he lost his Grandparents and Dad. When my grand dad went, the family was sniffing around for money, but he had nothing, but two rings, that my nana gave me a long with a watch which was the last thing she ever gave me. They did Censored all for her, when she needed the care, Sadly she passed a few years later, they got nothing. My auntie paid for her funeral, out of guilt. But what wages my nana had saved up, my auntie said its yours, to my mam. So my nana would rest easy for that one, as she was worried sick, about them getting their hands on her money. My uncle did Censored all for them so he got Censored all, along with the rest of my family. I managed to help get my nanas savings to my mam, by helping daft a letter up to the place who had her savings. My mam got a nice little pot, and i told her not to touch it. Thumbs Up Defender TD5 90 ---/--- Peugeot 306 HDI hatch back

Success is 90% Inspiration and 4 minutes Preparation # you can make it!
Post #995804 10th Jun 2023 2:46am
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Procta



Member Since: 04 Dec 2016
Location: Sunderland
Posts: 4937

United Kingdom 
spudfan wrote:
You have a daughter with special needs and your mother will not have anything to do with the child, did not even go to the christening. Daughter is 27, mother only seen her three times, my efforts. Yeah life can throw up some odd balls. But guess what, I see my lovely daughter every day but I cannot remember what my mother looks like. The choice had to made and my daughter won. No regrets.


Your mothers loss not yours or your daughters. Defender TD5 90 ---/--- Peugeot 306 HDI hatch back

Success is 90% Inspiration and 4 minutes Preparation # you can make it!
Post #995805 10th Jun 2023 2:47am
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