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| MartinK Member Since: 02 Mar 2011 Location: Silverdale (Lancashire/Cumbria Border) Posts: 2664   
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The wife was counting all the 1p's and 2p's out on the kitchen table when she suddenly got very angry and started shouting and crying for no reason.
I thought to myself, "She's going through the change." When I was in the pub I heard a couple of bigots saying that they wouldn't feel safe on an aircraft if they knew the pilot was a woman. What a pair of sexist twits. I mean, it's not as if she'd have to reverse the bloody thing! Local Police hunting the 'knitting needle nutter' who has stabbed six people in the bum in the last 48 hours, believe the attacker could be following some kind of pattern. Bought some 'rocket salad' yesterday but it went off before I could eat it! A teddy bear is working on a building site. He goes for a tea break and when he returns he notices his pick has been stolen. The bear is angry and reports the theft to the foreman. The foreman grins at the bear and says "Oh, I forgot to tell you, today's the day the teddy bears have their pick nicked." Murphy says to Paddy "What ya talkin to an envelope for?" "I'm sending a voicemail ya thick sod!" Just got back from my mate's funeral. He died after being hit on the head with a tennis ball. It was a lovely service. 19 Irish lads go to the cinema, the ticket lady asks "Why so many of you?" Mick replies, "The film said 18 or over." An Asian fellow has moved in next door. He has travelled the world, swum with sharks, wrestled bears and climbed the highest mountain. It came as no surprise to learn his name was Bindair Dundat Last night my young wife and I went to the local for a few drinks and a meal and as usual the bigots were out in force, just because I'm 50 and my wife is 20, I hated all the sly looks and comments we recieved It really spoilt our tenth anniversary. Defender "Puma" 2.4 110 County Utility (possibly the last of the 2.4's) |
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10th Nov 2011 9:49pm |
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| rossy Member Since: 29 Nov 2010 Location: Co. Roscommon Posts: 1296  
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I thought Bernard Manning had passed away
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10th Nov 2011 9:53pm |
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